What is a Frankenstein Essay, and Why Will It Destroy Your Application?

Cartoon of Frankenstein sitting at a desk, writing a personal statement with a quill, portraying a humorous juxtaposition of a monstrous figure engaged in a scholarly task
Avoid turning your personal statement into a ‘Frankenstein essay’. Even Frankenstein knows the importance of thoughtful, careful editing!

After nearly 20 years of reading, assessing, revising, and consulting on personal statements, I have seen every variety of mistake an applicant can make. More importantly for you, though, is that I am pretty good at identifying the upstream source of the problem and providing guidance on how to fix it. One of the most common mistakes might seem counterintuitive: the author sought too much help… or at least too much of the wrong kind!

Once you’ve finished your personal statement, you may feel a little apprehensive about what you have written, and as such it is only reasonable to seek out second and third opinions to make sure that you have overlooked nothing, the prose is tight, and you have made a compelling case for your candidacy.  But, just as an excellent revision and editing can make an average essay excellent, bad editing can wreck an essay.  On such occasions, one is smart to heed the old aphorism that ‘too many cooks spoil the broth.’

Once you have completed your first draft, you need to think carefully about how you go about using advice from other people.  Here are six pointers for how to get the best advice in order to turn your draft into an excellent final version you are proud of and happy with.

1.)  Be careful about who you pick.

Obviously, you want to get advice from someone who writes well, can be frank with you, and has some understanding of the field to which you are applying.  If you choose to get advice from a boyfriend or your mother, for example, then be careful because they might give you an overly glowing review because of their esteem and love for you or may lack the qualifications to point out minor problems with your approach.  Similarly, asking your English major friend to look at your Engineering graduate school essay is not a bad idea, but if you go that route, also have someone involved in Engineering (preferably in an academic capacity) is a good idea.

Good people to talk to are your academic advisor (if you are applying to graduate or professional schools) or guidance counselor (if you are applying to college).  I know that many people will take their essays to message boards and post them to see what people think of it.  The problem here is that you have no real way to gauge someone’s level of expertise and you may get too much feedback from too many sources.

Which leads us to point #2…

  1. Don’t give it to too many people.

If you get critiques on your essay from 8-9 different people and you incorporate all of their suggestions, you will be pulled in too many directions and the essay will lose its sense of voice and focus.  The old joke that a camel is a horse designed by committee applies here.  Your essay cannot be everything to everyone, and you have to accept this fact.  There will always be something that someone would have done differently, so they will often naturally advise you that you should do something different than what you are doing.

  1. Ask follow-up questions

Whenever someone suggests a change, don’t be afraid to ask them about it.  Sometimes you will agree with their rationale, but disagree with the execution of the change.  Also, through a conversation people will often help you see larger problems that you may have missed.  People are often hesitant to give tough advice, and a friendly conversation can help you to avoid this problem because by talking to someone, the person will see that you are serious about valuing their advice.

  1. Don’t be afraid to ignore advice.

At the end of the day, this is *your* personal statement, and *your* future depends on how well you execute it.  When someone suggests changes, consider their level of expertise, think about it carefully and if you disagree, then don’t do it.  Not every piece of advice given is good; often, you will receive terrible advice.

The final decision is yours, so take your role as the gatekeeper of advice seriously, and only let the best suggestions that work well with your theme, tone, approach and goal through.

  1. BUT, try to avoid pride of authorship

In my capacity as an admissions essay consultant, I often encounter customers who are furious when I tell them that they have things that they need to work on.  It is almost as if they paid me $200 for me to tell them that their work was perfect, and they should not change a single letter.

Because a personal statement is so, well, personal, it can sometimes sting when someone gives you some pointed advice.  Try to see the bigger picture and embrace the process that will help you to move towards a better and stronger essay.  Do your best not to see a critique of your essay as a criticism of you as a person, and rather see it as a positive moment that moves you one step closer to your goal.

  1. Consider using an essay editing service

They can be a bit expensive, but in the end, it makes sense to spend a hundred dollars to give yourself a better chance of getting into the graduate program of your dreams. Getting into a top school, as opposed to an average one, is worth investing in, especially when the cost is less than a pair of fancy Nikes or a new purse.

Some things to consider:

-Make sure that they guarantee your satisfaction.

-Ask if they will work with you beyond just receiving a single revision back from you.  Often, it will take 2-3 exchanges with your editor to completely understand what you want to say, how you want to say it, and what core message you want to convey.

At Gurufi, we don’t put a cap on the number of revisions you get, and we’re not happy until you are. That’s why we get such consistently excellent reviews!

For more help with your personal statement, check us out at Gurufi.com. Our personal statement editors and consultants have decades of experience helping clients get into top Masters and Ph.D. programs in STEM, humanities, fine arts, and social sciences. Our specialty is helping you craft compelling personal statements that move the needle in your admissions process! For questions, shoot us an email at service@gurufi.com. Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.

A Non-Minority Student’s Guide to Diversity Essays

An animated image featuring a diverse group of medical school students in a classroom setting. The students, representing various ethnicities, genders, and backgrounds, are all wearing white lab coats and have stethoscopes around their necks. Some are engaged in conversation, holding medical textbooks, or examining medical charts. The classroom is equipped with essential medical tools, adorned with anatomy posters, and includes a skeleton model in one corner. Their expressions convey happiness and a shared enthusiasm for learning, illustrating an inclusive and collaborative educational environment
Embracing Diversity in Medical Education: Future healthcare professionals learning together in an inclusive environment

As a non-minority student, it’s important to approach the writing of a diversity essay with sensitivity and an open mind. Here are five tips to help you write an effective diversity essay:

  1. Think of “diversity” expansively. When most people think of diversity in the context of admissions, they focus on racial, ethnic, national, gender, and sexual identity. But you should also think about experiential diversity. How has your life been different? Think about the kinds of people you’ve encountered, what they taught you, and how you grew. Reflect on the places you’ve lived, unique trials you’ve faced, jobs you’ve held, training you’ve received, or unusual insights you’ve gained. Then, take the additional step of asking yourself how these things would help you make School X a more dynamic, challenging, accepting, and comprehensive educational and life experience for your peers.

  1. Acknowledge privilege: It is important to acknowledge any privilege you may have as a result of your race, ethnicity, gender, or socio-economic background. Reflect on how your experiences may have been shaped by these factors, and how they have impacted your understanding of diversity and inclusion. A frame that can be helpful is to complete this sentence, and then expand on it in a brainstorming writing session: “my privilege has allowed me to ______, and as a result, I feel compelled to _______ in order to _____.” For instance, “My privilege as an upper-middle class man raised in a healthy home has allowed me to have access to mentoring, networks, and advice that many of my peers never had, and as a result, I feel compelled to mentor others, build robust inclusive networks, and look for talent in unexpected places.” This sort of opening could provide the foundation for an insightful, frank self-assessment that gives the reader genuine insight into your values.”

  1. Show empathy: Demonstrate your ability to understand and respect different perspectives and experiences by expressing empathy and a desire to learn from others. Describe how you plan to continue to learn about and engage with diverse communities in the future.

  1. Highlight your commitment to diversity: Emphasize your commitment to promoting diversity and inclusion in your academic and professional pursuits. Explain how you plan to use your experiences and understanding of these issues to contribute to the graduate school community. Identifying and listing your values is good, but providing stories and examples is much better.

  1. Seek feedback: Before submitting your diversity essay, consider seeking feedback from someone who has experience with these types of essays. This could be a mentor, a teacher, or someone else who has a good understanding of the graduate school application process. Their feedback can help you refine your essay and ensure that it effectively communicates your commitment to diversity.

Importantly, our editors and consultants at Gurufi have extensive experience helping people write diversity essays.

Lastly, we recognize that this form of essay can feel unusual or uncomfortable, especially for non-American applicants who aren’t conversant with the world of DEI, why universities value diversity, or even what this idea means. After all, many applicants come from places that are largely mono-racial.

So, while there can be a learning curve, your mindset should ultimately be that the diversity essay is an opportunity to demonstrate your understanding and commitment to promoting diversity and inclusion, whether or not you are a minority. By reflecting on their experiences, acknowledging privilege, showing empathy, highlighting their commitment, and seeking feedback, non-minority students can write effective diversity essays that showcase their ability to contribute to diverse and inclusive academic communities.

For more help with your personal statement, check us out at Gurufi.com. Our personal statement editors and consultants have decades of experience helping clients get into top MBA programs. Our specialty is helping you craft compelling personal statements that move the needle in your admissions process! For questions, shoot us an email at service@gurufi.com. Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.