Tag: personal statement brainstorming

What is a Frankenstein Essay, and Why Will It Destroy Your Application?

Cartoon of Frankenstein sitting at a desk, writing a personal statement with a quill, portraying a humorous juxtaposition of a monstrous figure engaged in a scholarly task
Avoid turning your personal statement into a ‘Frankenstein essay’. Even Frankenstein knows the importance of thoughtful, careful editing!

After nearly 20 years of reading, assessing, revising, and consulting on personal statements, I have seen every variety of mistake an applicant can make. More importantly for you, though, is that I am pretty good at identifying the upstream source of the problem and providing guidance on how to fix it. One of the most common mistakes might seem counterintuitive: the author sought too much help… or at least too much of the wrong kind!

Once you’ve finished your personal statement, you may feel a little apprehensive about what you have written, and as such it is only reasonable to seek out second and third opinions to make sure that you have overlooked nothing, the prose is tight, and you have made a compelling case for your candidacy.  But, just as an excellent revision and editing can make an average essay excellent, bad editing can wreck an essay.  On such occasions, one is smart to heed the old aphorism that ‘too many cooks spoil the broth.’

Once you have completed your first draft, you need to think carefully about how you go about using advice from other people.  Here are six pointers for how to get the best advice in order to turn your draft into an excellent final version you are proud of and happy with.

1.)  Be careful about who you pick.

Obviously, you want to get advice from someone who writes well, can be frank with you, and has some understanding of the field to which you are applying.  If you choose to get advice from a boyfriend or your mother, for example, then be careful because they might give you an overly glowing review because of their esteem and love for you or may lack the qualifications to point out minor problems with your approach.  Similarly, asking your English major friend to look at your Engineering graduate school essay is not a bad idea, but if you go that route, also have someone involved in Engineering (preferably in an academic capacity) is a good idea.

Good people to talk to are your academic advisor (if you are applying to graduate or professional schools) or guidance counselor (if you are applying to college).  I know that many people will take their essays to message boards and post them to see what people think of it.  The problem here is that you have no real way to gauge someone’s level of expertise and you may get too much feedback from too many sources.

Which leads us to point #2…

  1. Don’t give it to too many people.

If you get critiques on your essay from 8-9 different people and you incorporate all of their suggestions, you will be pulled in too many directions and the essay will lose its sense of voice and focus.  The old joke that a camel is a horse designed by committee applies here.  Your essay cannot be everything to everyone, and you have to accept this fact.  There will always be something that someone would have done differently, so they will often naturally advise you that you should do something different than what you are doing.

  1. Ask follow-up questions

Whenever someone suggests a change, don’t be afraid to ask them about it.  Sometimes you will agree with their rationale, but disagree with the execution of the change.  Also, through a conversation people will often help you see larger problems that you may have missed.  People are often hesitant to give tough advice, and a friendly conversation can help you to avoid this problem because by talking to someone, the person will see that you are serious about valuing their advice.

  1. Don’t be afraid to ignore advice.

At the end of the day, this is *your* personal statement, and *your* future depends on how well you execute it.  When someone suggests changes, consider their level of expertise, think about it carefully and if you disagree, then don’t do it.  Not every piece of advice given is good; often, you will receive terrible advice.

The final decision is yours, so take your role as the gatekeeper of advice seriously, and only let the best suggestions that work well with your theme, tone, approach and goal through.

  1. BUT, try to avoid pride of authorship

In my capacity as an admissions essay consultant, I often encounter customers who are furious when I tell them that they have things that they need to work on.  It is almost as if they paid me $200 for me to tell them that their work was perfect, and they should not change a single letter.

Because a personal statement is so, well, personal, it can sometimes sting when someone gives you some pointed advice.  Try to see the bigger picture and embrace the process that will help you to move towards a better and stronger essay.  Do your best not to see a critique of your essay as a criticism of you as a person, and rather see it as a positive moment that moves you one step closer to your goal.

  1. Consider using an essay editing service

They can be a bit expensive, but in the end, it makes sense to spend a hundred dollars to give yourself a better chance of getting into the graduate program of your dreams. Getting into a top school, as opposed to an average one, is worth investing in, especially when the cost is less than a pair of fancy Nikes or a new purse.

Some things to consider:

-Make sure that they guarantee your satisfaction.

-Ask if they will work with you beyond just receiving a single revision back from you.  Often, it will take 2-3 exchanges with your editor to completely understand what you want to say, how you want to say it, and what core message you want to convey.

At Gurufi, we don’t put a cap on the number of revisions you get, and we’re not happy until you are. That’s why we get such consistently excellent reviews!

For more help with your personal statement, check us out at Gurufi.com. Our personal statement editors and consultants have decades of experience helping clients get into top Masters and Ph.D. programs in STEM, humanities, fine arts, and social sciences. Our specialty is helping you craft compelling personal statements that move the needle in your admissions process! For questions, shoot us an email at service@gurufi.com. Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.

Do *NOT* Write Your Medical School Personal Statement About This…

The death of a grandparent is the most overused cliche on personal statements

“As I looked into my grandma’s eyes, a single tear rolled down my cheek. I wished that I could save her life, but I felt so powerless. In that moment, I knew that I had to become a doctor so that I could save the lives of people like Grammy. I was only six years old, but that moment changed my life!”

Does your personal statement begin like this? In my 17 years of helping aspiring physicians earn admission into their dream medical school, I have seen some version of this essay hundreds of times. The dying grandma (or aunt, uncle, or grandpa…), the bedside revelation, the moment of irrevocable inspiration.

I don’t doubt that such moments occur nor that they are deeply meaningful, but I do worry that after reading the 25th such story in a week, the Admissions Committee will find it hard to differentiate your application from the scores of other people whose essays feature a med school origin story that requires the sacrifice poor ol’Granny.

Of course, I’m being a bit facetious (okay, a LOT facetious), but depending on the year, I would guess that between 15% and 30% of medical school essays lean heavily on this trope. The personal statement is just too valuable to waste on a story that the AdCom has read hundreds of times before. Applicants have one opportunity to frame their experiences, accomplishments, and goals, and selecting a cliché subject for your personal statements instantly puts you in the JAG (“just another guy” / “just another gal”) pile. Although the applicant may consider these subjects to be significant, they are overused and do not help the candidate stand out.

Cliches are shallow and don’t give a complete picture of the applicant’s motives and objectives. An applicant’s experiences should be discussed in their personal statement, along with how those experiences affected their decision to pursue a career in medicine. It’s this second part that too often gets overlooked. Obviously, experiences and stories are central to your personal statement and application, BUT you need to build out these stories by linking them to bigger themes, making clear how and why they motivated you (as manifested in actions and decisions), and then projecting that motivation into a vision of the future you aspire to build. The superficial facts of an encounter are frequently highlighted in cliches, leaving out the applicant’s internal dialogue or feelings. The admissions committee could find it difficult to comprehend the applicant’s motivations for applying to medical school without this extra information.

Cliches can sometimes be deceptive and fail to accurately represent an applicant’s experiences. For instance, a candidate who writes about their time spent volunteering at a hospital can say that it confirmed their decision to pursue a career in medicine. The reader can’t know how profound an experience was, though, until the author describes it in detail and reflects on their feelings and ideas when they were having it. Cliches can thereby produce a fictitious narrative that is unrepresentative of the applicant’s experiences and motives. This is why I often urge applicants whose personal statements look flat or cliché to do a journaling or brainstorming exercise where they explore their feelings on the topic, how they worked through an experience or challenge, how it transformed them, and why it informs the kind of doctor they will become.

A useful tip for moving beyond cliché is to provide specifics and engage in deeper storytelling. For instance, many applicants will discuss their time doing volunteer work at a hospital. Does this mean you should avoid that experience altogether in your personal statement? NO! Instead, highlight specific instances and give depth, detail, and personality to that story. Describing your duties in a broad way won’t have nearly the impact that telling a single story of a meaningful interaction with a patient or a hard conversation with a doctor. Tell me about how you assisted a patient with navigating the healthcare system AND HOW THAT INFORMED YOUR VISION OF MEDICINE, or tell me why a particular medical procedure was exciting for you to witness.

You might also talk about how their experiences outside of medicine, such working in another industry or engaging in creative hobbies, have inspired their choice to become a doctor. These subjects offer a more thorough and distinctive perspective of the candidate, highlighting their personality and capacity for critical thought.

Candidates should also think back on their experiences, take into account the lessons they acquired from them, and assess how those experiences have affected their aspirations. Instead of just recounting an incident, candidates should discuss how it affected them academically and emotionally and motivated them to seek a career in medicine. A candidate who had a personal health crisis, for instance, may talk about how that event motivated them to support others or engage in relevant research.

When talking with a colleague a few years back, we joked that May, when applicants begin working on their personal statements, was the “grandma culling season.” Beyond this dark joke, there is a deeper bit of actionable advice for you: cliches lack depth and complexity, can be deceptive, and fail to exhibit an applicant’s originality and critical thinking abilities. Candidates can write a personal statement that highlights their abilities and potential as healthcare professionals by emphasizing their unique experiences and thinking back on the lessons gained and how they have affected their aspirations.

A personal statement gives you 5300 characters to make your case, and it’s often the biggest differentiator between acceptance and denial. Therefore, it’s imperative for candidates to approach this crucial part of the application process with imagination and consideration.

For more help with your personal statement, check us out at Gurufi.com. Our personal statement editors and consultants have decades of experience helping clients get into top medical schools. Our specialty is helping you craft compelling personal statements that move the needle in your admissions process! For questions, shoot us an email atservice@gurufi.com. Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.