Ten Mistakes to Avoid in Your Medical School Personal Essay

A cartoon of a stressed-out student sitting at a cluttered desk with a laptop, books, papers, and a coffee cup, showing a worried expression with a thought bubble containing 5300 characters, a doctor, a hospital, and a ticking clock.
5300 Characters Can Determine Your Life!

5300 characters. That’s all you have. After years spent taking demanding prerequisites, stuffing your CV full of volunteer, research, and clinical experiences, and studying for months for the MCAT, you have 5300 characters -about 700 words- to tell the admissions committee why they should take you. No pressure.

In our 18 years of helping clients build compelling personal statements for medical school, we have seen people make just about every mistake you can imagine. Sometimes people make amazing new ones, but mostly they tend to make the same ones that most of their fellow applicants make. Avoiding these mistakes can help you create a stronger, more effective personal statement. Here are some typical errors and advice on how to avoid them:

1. Being Too Generic

One of the most common mistakes is writing a generic personal statement that could apply to any applicant. Admissions committees read thousands of essays, so it’s essential to make yours stand out. Avoid clichés and broad statements like “I want to help people” or “I have always been passionate about medicine.”

Don’t open with a bedside story about the night your grandma died and please avoid, at all costs, the phrase “tears in her eyes…” Yes, you do need to provide specific examples and personal anecdotes that highlight your unique journey and motivations, but do it in a way that features how you really felt and acted, and not how you think the AdCom wants to see you or how you imagine the scene might play out in a Hallmark Channel Christmas movie.

  1. Focusing Too Much on Others

    While it’s important to acknowledge the influence of mentors, family members, or patients, your personal statement should primarily focus on you. Thus the “personal” in “personal statement.” Avoid spending too much time discussing other people’s achievements or stories. Admissions committees want to learn about your experiences, qualities, and aspirations. Make sure your essay centers on your journey and how it has prepared you for a career in medicine.

It’s fine if you weren’t the MVP of the team or the leader of the group. Focus on what you DID do, the role you played, and what it taught you.

  1. Listing Experiences Without Reflection

    A great personal statement is far more than just a narrative CV. Simply listing your experiences and accomplishments is not enough. Admissions committees are looking for reflection and insight. Explain the significance of each experience and how it has shaped your decision to pursue medicine. Discuss the skills and lessons you have gained and how they have prepared you for medical school and a medical career.

A good rule of thumb is to “tell fewer stories better.” Instead of stuffing six stories into your essay, instead focus on two or three. Remember, you have your Work & Activities section and secondary essays to cover additional ground.

  1. Overemphasizing Academic Achievements

    While academic achievements are important, your personal statement should provide a holistic view of who you are. Avoid focusing solely on your academic successes. Highlight your extracurricular activities, volunteer work, research, clinical experiences, and personal interests. This approach demonstrates that you are a well-rounded individual with diverse experiences and skills.

Typically, you don’t even mention your grades or academic awards in a personal statement. The committee will already have that data, so no need to rehash it.

5. Neglecting to Address Motivations

Your essay needs, at some point, to answer the “why medicine?” question. Admissions committees want to understand why you are passionate about medicine and what drives you to pursue this challenging career. Failing to clearly articulate your motivations is a common mistake. Reflect on the experiences and values that have led you to this path and explain them compellingly. This clarity helps the committee see your genuine commitment to the field.

Importantly, if you have extensive experience within a field such as nursing or public health and you are looking to transition into a medical career, you need to make sure that your “why medicine?” also covers the “why not just keep working within public health?”

  1. Writing a Chronological Essay

    Your personal statement doesn’t HAVE TO be chronological. Avoid simply recounting your life story in order. Instead, focus on a few key experiences that have been pivotal in your decision to pursue medicine. Use these experiences to illustrate your qualities, motivations, and readiness for medical school. A thematic approach can make your essay more engaging and impactful. And, if done well, opening a bit further forward, then in your second paragraph doing a “soft reset” and telling your full story can be really effective.

    7. Using Complex Language and Jargon

    While it’s important to write professionally, using overly complex language or medical jargon can make your essay difficult to read. It also feels stiff and inhuman at a moment when you are trying to establish a sense of connection with your reader. Aim for clarity and simplicity. Write in a way that is accessible to a broad audience, including those who may not have a medical background. Clear and concise writing is more effective and demonstrates strong communication skills.

    8. Failing to Show Personal Growth

    Medical schools are looking for applicants who demonstrate personal growth and the ability to learn from experiences. Failing to show this growth is a missed opportunity. Reflect on the challenges you have faced and how you have overcome them. Discuss what you have learned from your experiences and how they have prepared you for a career in medicine. This reflection shows maturity and resilience.

    9. Not Proofreading Carefully

    Typos, grammatical errors, and awkward phrasing can detract from the quality of your personal statement. Not proofreading carefully is a common mistake that can be easily avoided. After writing your essay, take the time to proofread it multiple times.

  1. Not getting outside help.

Consider seeking feedback from mentors, peers, or professional consultants to catch any errors you might have missed. A polished, error-free essay reflects your attention to detail and professionalism. Obviously, this is something we can help you with at Gurufi.com, but if you cannot afford outside services, then lean on people whose writing you trust and also see what resources your school provides, as many will help former graduates even some years after they leave.

For more help with your personal statement, check us out at Gurufi.com. Our personal statement editors and consultants have decades of experience helping clients get into top medical schools. Our specialty is helping you craft compelling personal statements that move the needle in your admissions process! For questions, shoot us an email at service@gurufi.com. Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.

How to Build Powerful Med School Secondaries

A four-panel cartoon illustrating the journey of a medical school applicant. In the first panel, a weary student stands at the start of a long, winding path carrying a heavy backpack filled with books, a laptop, and papers. In the second panel, the student, looking even more exhausted, reaches a point where the path splits into multiple smaller paths. In the third panel, the student sits on a rock, looking at a map while a mentor figure offers a bottle and smiles encouragingly. In the fourth panel, the student appears confident and focused, writing on a laptop with papers spread out around them.
The journey of a medical school applicant: From initial preparations to mastering secondary essays, with guidance and perseverance leading to success.

Here at Gurufi, we spend much of the late summer and early fall working with hundreds of clients to perfect their medical school secondaries. In my experience, at this point, applicants are quite exhausted by the immense work it takes to get to this point: studying for and taking the MCAT, getting letters of rec, completing your prerequisite courses, supplementing your clinical experience, completing the AMCAS, and ironing out your personal statement and Word & Activities sections. Now, you must complete a dozen or more additional school-specific essays. This naturally leads people to wonder how they can complement their existing materials in ways that maximize the value and impact of their secondaries. This post seeks to help you craft powerful secondary essays.

Secondary essays provide an opportunity to showcase your unique qualities, experiences, and motivations that make you a suitable candidate a specific medical school. Crafting effective secondary essays requires thoughtful reflection and a strategic approach. Here’s how to respond to common secondary essay prompts and tailor your responses for different schools:

1. Understand the Purpose of Secondary Essays

Secondary essays allow admissions committees to learn more about you beyond your primary application. Moreover, because the admission committees of particular schools craft these essays, they reflect questions that the AdCom obviously cares about. They are designed to assess your fit for the specific program, your alignment with the school’s values, and your readiness for the challenges of medical school. Understanding this purpose will help you craft essays that effectively convey your qualifications and aspirations.

2. Research Each School Thoroughly

Before writing your secondary essays, conduct thorough research on each medical school you are applying to. Understand their mission, values, curriculum, and unique features. Familiarize yourself with their specific programs, faculty, research opportunities, and community involvement. Talk to people at the school, including both faculty and staff if you can. This research will enable you to tailor your responses to align with the school’s specific expectations and culture.

3. Address Common Secondary Essay Prompts

While each school may have unique prompts, some common themes often appear in secondary essays. Here are strategies for responding to these common prompts:

a. Why This School?

This prompt asks you to explain why you are interested in attending that particular medical school. Be specific and detailed in your response. Highlight aspects of the program that resonate with your career goals and interests. Mention unique opportunities, such as specific research programs, clinical experiences, or community service initiatives, that make the school a good fit for you. Demonstrating a genuine interest and thorough knowledge of the school will strengthen your response.

One thing to beware of is writing a “school brochure” where you simply list a series of things that you like about the school. This doesn’t show much more than that you have access to Google. If you can explain in depth, using examples from your past, a few things really well, that is much better than mentioning a bunch of things. As with personal statements, saying one or two things really well is better than saying a bunch of things poorly.

b. Describe a Challenge You’ve Overcome

This prompt seeks to understand your resilience and problem-solving abilities. Choose a significant challenge you have faced, either personally or professionally. Describe the context, the actions you took to address the challenge, and the lessons you learned from the experience. Focus on how the experience has prepared you for the rigors of medical school and a career in medicine.

c. Diversity and Inclusion

Many medical schools value diversity and seek to understand how you will contribute to a diverse and inclusive community. Reflect on your background, experiences, and perspectives that contribute to your unique identity. Discuss how your experiences with diversity have shaped your worldview and how you plan to promote inclusivity in medical school and your future career.

d. Significant Research Experience

If you have significant research experience, this prompt allows you to highlight your contributions to scientific knowledge. Describe your research project, your role, and the impact of your findings. Explain how this experience has influenced your interest in medicine and your future career goals. Emphasize any skills you developed, such as critical thinking, data analysis, or teamwork.

There are three additional points that I’d make with this prompt. First, writing about science can be hard. It’s difficult to balance accuracy, clarity, and complexity. As such, this is among the most difficult kinds of admissions writing and you may want to think about getting help with someone experienced and adept with this. (like Gurufi! ) Second, think about how you view the role of science and research as you move forward. Do you (be honest) intend to continue doing research in and beyond medical school? If so, think about including this, even if briefly, in your essay. Lastly, also think about your research experience in the same way that you wrote about an important job in your Work & Activities section: did you grow, improve, receive additional responsibilities, or earn a promotion?

  1. Professional Goals and Aspirations

    This prompt asks you to articulate your career goals and how the medical school will help you achieve them. Be clear and specific about your short-term and long-term goals. Explain how the school’s resources, faculty, and curriculum align with your aspirations. Demonstrating a clear vision for your future and how the school fits into that vision shows that you are focused and motivated.

    4. Tailor Your Responses

    Tailoring your responses for each school is essential to demonstrate your genuine interest and fit. Use the research you conducted to incorporate specific details about the school into your essays. Mention faculty members you are excited to work with, unique programs that align with your interests, and community initiatives that you want to be part of. Personalizing your essays shows that you have a sincere interest in the school and have thoughtfully considered how it aligns with your goals.

    5. Be Authentic and Reflective

    Authenticity is key to crafting compelling secondary essays. Be honest about your experiences, motivations, and aspirations. Reflect on your journey and share meaningful insights that provide a deeper understanding of who you are. Avoid generic statements and clichés. Instead, focus on specific examples and personal stories that illustrate your points.

    6. Show, Don’t Tell

I’m sure you’ve heard this before. I don’t love “show, don’t tell” as a piece of advice because it doesn’t feel actionable. You can get to the same idea by saying “tell a story and let the story demonstrate your traits.” Not as punchy, but more accurate. For example, instead of simply stating that you are passionate about medicine, provide examples that demonstrate your passion. Describe experiences that have solidified your commitment to the field and the actions you have taken to pursue your interest. This approach makes your essays more vivid and memorable.

If you need help with storytelling, check out this video. It was made for MBA applicants, but all of the core ideas apply to medical school applications. This other video also provides a useful way to attack the “show don’t tell” problem.

7. Edit and Revise

Writing effective secondary essays requires multiple drafts and revisions. After writing your initial draft, take a break and then revisit your essay with fresh eyes. Seek feedback from mentors, peers, or professional consultants to gain different perspectives. Revise your essays to improve clarity, coherence, and impact. Pay attention to grammar, spelling, and punctuation to ensure your essays are polished and professional.

BUT, do be judicious with who you send your essay to. Too many chefs spoil the broth.

Crafting effective secondary essays for medical school applications involves understanding the purpose of these essays, conducting thorough research, addressing common prompts thoughtfully, and tailoring your responses to each school. By being authentic, reflective, and detail-oriented, you can create compelling essays that resonate with admissions committees and enhance your chances of acceptance. Good luck with your applications!

For more help with your personal statement, check us out at Gurufi.com. Our personal statement editors and consultants have decades of experience helping clients get into top medical schools. Our specialty is helping you craft compelling personal statements that move the needle in your admissions process! For questions, shoot us an email at service@gurufi.com. Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.

Mistakes to Avoid When Planning Your Personal Statement, Secondaries, and Work & Activities

applicant preparing his medical school application
Have a plan for your entire medical school application before you begin

Of all the graduate and professional schools, medical school has the most onerous admissions process. Between MCATs, science prerequisites, personal statements, and secondaries, it can certainly feel overwhelming.

In the 15 years we’ve been helping applicants earn admission to their dream schools, we have become quite familiar with how difficult it can be to juggle all of the different pieces of written application materials. Crafting these components effectively requires a clear understanding of their distinct purposes and how they interrelate. This article will guide you through strategizing each part of the AMCAS application to present a compelling and cohesive narrative to admissions committees.

Planning Your Application

The best approach to tackling the AMCAS application is to begin with comprehensive planning. Start by reviewing the secondary essay prompts for all the schools you are applying to. While many of these prompts for the current application cycle may not yet be released, you can look at last year’s prompts, as they often remain largely unchanged. By gathering all the prompts, you can map out a plan to cover all your main points without redundancy.

The Personal Statement

The AMCAS personal statement serves two primary purposes: explaining the source of your interest in medicine and making the strongest case for your admission. Think of the personal statement as your opportunity to make a powerful impression on the committee in just 90 seconds. This requires focusing on depth, storytelling, and personal authenticity.

1. Depth and Storytelling: Your personal statement should delve deeply into your motivations for pursuing medicine. Use storytelling to illustrate your journey, highlighting pivotal moments that shaped your decision. Avoid generic statements; instead, provide specific examples that demonstrate your passion and commitment.

2. Personal Authenticity: Authenticity is crucial. Admissions committees want to see the real you, not an idealized version. Reflect on your unique experiences and perspectives, and convey them honestly. Authenticity resonates more than trying to fit a perceived mold of what a medical school applicant should be.

The Work & Activities Section

If the personal statement is about depth, the Work & Activities section is about breadth. This section allows you to demonstrate that you are a well-rounded candidate by showcasing a range of experiences. The main categories to cover are academic readiness, scientific bona fides, service, leadership, and character.

1. Verbs and Actions: Focus on what you did in each activity. Use strong, action-oriented verbs to describe your roles and contributions. This not only highlights your accomplishments but also demonstrates growth, initiative, and leadership.

2. “Most Significant” Entries: In the Work & Activities section, you have the opportunity to designate three experiences as “most significant.” Use these longer entries to provide depth to your application, complementing the breadth demonstrated in the other entries. If your personal statement focuses heavily on one or two areas, use these significant entries to balance your application by highlighting other aspects.

3. Avoid Redundancy: While it is fine to reference an experience mentioned in your personal statement, avoid repeating the same information. Instead, provide additional insights or details that were not covered in the personal statement.

The Secondary Essays

Secondary essays are school-specific and allow you to demonstrate why you are a good fit for each particular institution. These essays should be tailored carefully to address each prompt and align with the values and mission of the school.

1. School-Specific Fit: Research each school’s mission, values, and programs to understand what they are looking for in applicants. Use this information to craft essays that not only respond to the prompts but also highlight how your experiences and goals align with the school’s ethos.

2. Repurposing Text: While it is efficient to repurpose sections of text for multiple secondaries, do so with caution. Ensure that each essay remains responsive to the specific prompt and tailored to the school’s unique characteristics.

Integrating Key Concepts

As you compile these components, it is essential to integrate key concepts that medical schools value: leadership, service, advocacy, outreach, cultural competency, and diversity. Find ways to infuse your experiences with these themes, demonstrating your commitment through actions you have taken.

1. Leadership: Highlight instances where you have taken initiative, led teams, or influenced positive changes. This can be in academic, professional, or community settings.

2. Service: Showcase your dedication to serving others, whether through volunteer work, community service, or patient care experiences. Emphasize the impact you have made and the lessons you have learned.

3. Advocacy and Outreach: Demonstrate your involvement in advocacy or outreach efforts, especially those aimed at addressing healthcare disparities or improving community health. This shows your commitment to making a broader impact in medicine.

4. Cultural Competency and Diversity: Reflect on experiences that have enhanced your cultural competency and ability to work with diverse populations. Medical schools seek applicants who can navigate and contribute to diverse environments effectively.

Final Thoughts

Strategizing your AMCAS personal statement, Work & Activities, and secondary essays involves a careful balance of depth and breadth, authenticity, and strategic alignment with each school’s values. By planning ahead, focusing on what each section is supposed to accomplish, and integrating key concepts valued by medical schools, you can present a compelling and cohesive narrative that maximizes your chances of admission.

Remember, the goal is to provide a comprehensive picture of who you are as an applicant, highlighting both your qualifications and your personal journey toward a career in medicine. With thoughtful planning and execution, you can create an application that stands out and resonates with admissions committees.

For more help with your personal statement, check us out at Gurufi.com. Our personal statement editors and consultants have decades of experience helping clients get into top medical schools. Our specialty is helping you craft compelling personal statements that move the needle in your admissions process! For questions, shoot us an email at service@gurufi.com. Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.

Crafting a Compelling Work & Activities Section for Your AMCAS Application

A cartoon of a young medical student at a desk, surrounded by tools like a laptop, notepad, and pen. The room is bright and colorful, with symbols of the medical field such as a stethoscope, a heart symbol, and a medical cross. The student is smiling and focused on their work.
Have a plan when writing your Work & Activities Section!

              In my decade+ helping applicants get into their dream medical schools, I have revised probably 500+ Work & Activities sections. I’ve discovered that even applicants who spend weeks, or even months, building and fine-tuning their personal statements will treat the Work & Activities section almost as an afterthought. The drafts they send are rife with grammar errors, and often they assume they don’t even need to write in complete sentences.

              This is a big mistake.

              When you’re filling out your AMCAS Work & Activities section, it’s crucial to put as much thought into it as you would a cover letter or a personal statement. This section is your opportunity to illustrate your experiences, demonstrate your growth, and reflect on how these activities have prepared you for a career in medicine. If the personal statement is a single, deep introduction to who you are and what you value, then the W&A is your opportunity to complement that depth with well-considered breadth. It is a crucial part of your application, and you need to give it serious thought. Yesterday, I wrote about how you can go about selecting your three “Most Significant” activities for mini-essays, but today I want to focus on the other items that you include.

              Here are some strategies to make your Work & Activities section stand out.

Write in Full Sentences

Resist the temptation to use “resume shorthand.” While bullet points and concise phrases might be suitable for a resume, the AMCAS application is not the place for them. People often write in shorthand incomplete sentences because they want to say more, but you’re always better off saying a bit less but saying it much better. Write complete sentences that clearly describe your role, responsibilities, and contributions. This approach helps the reader understand the context of your experiences and the impact you made.

Care About Verb Choice

Choosing the right verbs can transform a simple activity description into a vivid account of your involvement. Powerful verbs like “led,” “developed,” “initiated,” and “collaborated” paint a picture of active engagement and responsibility. Whenever you see a “to be” (am, was, were, is, etc.) think about whether you can replace it with something more vivid and active. By focusing on action-oriented language, you highlight what you did, not just your title.

Focus on Learning and Improvement

Medical schools are interested in candidates who learn from their experiences and show personal growth. When describing your activities, consider what you gained from each experience. Did you develop new skills, overcome challenges, or gain insights into the medical field? Share these learnings to give admissions committees a sense of your journey and evolution.

Connect Activities to Medical School Preparation

While you don’t need to explicitly state how an activity prepared you for medical school, it’s helpful to think about this connection when writing your descriptions. If a particular experience had a significant impact on your decision to pursue medicine or taught you valuable skills for your future career, consider weaving that into your narrative.

This approach adds depth to your application and shows a clear link between your experiences and your medical aspirations.

Use Adjectives to Guide Your Writing… but keep most of them out of your entries

Before you write each entry, think about 3-5 adjectives you want to convey about yourself.

These could be qualities like “compassionate,” “dedicated,” “innovative,” or “team-oriented.” Let these adjectives guide your word choice and the aspects of your experience that you emphasize. This strategy helps maintain consistency and ensures that your descriptions align with your overall message. That said, your writing needs to be lean, so the words themselves likely won’t make the cut as you trim to meet the 700-character caps. But if you start out thinking about these descriptors as your North Star, they will come across in the text.

Write Like You Talk

Avoid stilted language or industry jargon that might sound insincere. Medical school admissions committees appreciate clarity and authenticity. Write in a conversational tone that reflects your personality and avoids excessive technical terms or jargon. This approach helps create a more engaging narrative and ensures your descriptions are accessible to all readers. If you wouldn’t use a word in your everyday life, don’t use it in your essay. A good way to identify stilted language is to read your text aloud to a friend and have them note places that don’t sound like you. You can also do the same by recording yourself reading it, then listening back. Moments that give you the “icks” might be indicative of them not being authentic to your voice.

Additional Tips

Be Specific: Provide concrete examples to illustrate your points. Instead of saying “I participated in research,” describe the project, your role, and any outcomes.

Keep It Concise: While you want to use full sentences, avoid unnecessary verbosity. Aim for clear, succinct descriptions that get to the point.

Review and Revise: Proofread your entries for grammar, punctuation, and clarity. Consider asking a mentor or advisor to review your Work & Activities section for feedback. Of course, we at Gurufi are experts at revising these texts, including trimming down overly long entries to fit the caps!

With these tips in mind, you can create a compelling Work & Activities section that effectively communicates your experiences, growth, and readiness for a career in medicine. Good luck!

For more help with your personal statement, check us out at Gurufi.com. Our personal statement editors and consultants have decades of experience helping clients get into top medical schools. Our specialty is helping you craft compelling personal statements that move the needle in your admissions process! For questions, shoot us an email at service@gurufi.com. Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.

A Partner’s Guide to Surviging Medical School & Residency

Cartoon of a supportive husband comforting his exhausted wife, a medical school student, at her desk filled with textbooks and an open laptop. He stands behind her, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder and offering a cup of coffee, symbolizing encouragement and care in her journey to becoming a doctor.
Be a good partner through the hard times.

Next week, we’ll be releasing our course on putting together your medical school personal statement. Before we began, though, I wanted to provide the additional perspective of somebody married to a doctor. When we first met, my wife was a medical student, so I’ve been with her through the process of medical school, residency, fellowship, and the first stages of her career. I’ve helped her mentees and classmates with their essays and admission / matching processes, and I understand what a partner of a physician and aspiring physician faces.

I won’t offend doctors by claiming it’s as hard as medical school, but being the partner of a doctor is a difficult road, so I wanted to write two brief little snippets on what you should be prepared for, how you can help, and how you can position yourself personal and as a couple for long-term success.

Next week, I’ll go back to providing insights and advice for medical school applications and personal statements, but first: how should a spouse think about medical school?

As the spouse or partner of a future medical student, you are about to embark on a unique and challenging journey. Medical school can be a demanding and stressful time, but with the right support, it can also be an incredibly rewarding experience. Here are some tips to help you survive and thrive during this exciting time.

  1. Understand the demands of medical school: Medical school is a rigorous and demanding program that requires a significant amount of time and effort. It is important to understand the demands of the program and be prepared to support your partner as they navigate the challenges ahead. Be aware of the long hours, intensive studying, and clinical rotations that will be a part of their daily routine.

During medical school, there were long stretches where my wife wasn’t around much, because she was studying or doing rotations. That obviously became much more protracted and intense when her residency began. I was finishing my Ph.D., so I had things to do, but I also knew that the physical, mental, and emotional intensity of medical school was on a whole other level, so I did what I could to empathize and make her life a little easier.

  1. Communicate openly and honestly: Good communication is key to a healthy and supportive relationship, especially during the challenges of medical school. Make sure to have regular, open, and honest conversations with your partner about their experiences and how you can support them. Be an active listener and offer encouragement and support when needed. Understand that many conversations will occur when your partner is exhausted, so don’t choose those times to start arguments. In fact, one of the best things you can do to support your partner through this process is to improve their sleep situation. Blackout windows, a cooling mattress, white noise machine, and keeping a silent house will be immensely appreciated!
  2. Be flexible and understanding: Medical school can be demanding and stressful, and it may require significant changes to your normal routine. Be flexible and understanding of your partner’s needs and try to make changes that will help both of you balance your priorities. This may include adjusting your work schedule, rearranging household responsibilities, or making other modifications to your daily routine.
  3. Get involved in the medical school community: Joining the medical school community can help you stay informed about what’s happening and provide opportunities to meet other partners and spouses. This can include attending events, participating in clubs and organizations, or volunteering for events and initiatives. And, understand that when medical school students, residents, or doctors get together, they basically only talk about medicine. So having some non-doctors around in those social settings will help keep you sane.
  4. Maintain your own interests and hobbies: It is important to maintain your own interests and hobbies. Most weeks, my wife had one (maybe two) day off, and when she was ‘on’ she was basically gone from before sunrise until late into the night. As such, I had to find ways to entertain myself. I went to a ton of Red Sox games, worked out, binged documentaries, and got a dog.

Make time for the activities that bring you joy and fulfillment, and consider taking on new challenges and experiences that will help you grow and develop.

  1. Encourage self-care and stress management: Medical school can be a stressful time for both you and your partner. Encourage your partner to prioritize self-care and stress management, including exercise, healthy eating habits, and time for relaxation and rejuvenation. It can be hard to hit the gym hard after the fifth day of 19-hour shifts, but when you have a chance, find opportunities to do things together that will make you both happy.
  2. Offer support during high-stakes times: Medical school is full of high-stakes moments, such as exams, clinical rotations, and residency interviews. Offer your support and encouragement during these times, and be there to celebrate your partner’s successes and provide comfort during setbacks. These don’t have to be grand gestures. I always made a point of having coffee brewed, keeping leftovers in the fridge for when she came home, and keeping stocked with her favorite snacks: Whole Foods mango slices.

Also, doctors likely deal with heavy matters of life and death, and when they break down or want to talk about them, accept that you probably won’t have any answers, and maybe can’t provide any comfort, but they will appreciate your willingness to listen and provide sympathy.

  1. Be a sounding board: Medical school can be a time of intense self-reflection and growth, and it is important for you to be a sounding board for your partner. Listen to their ideas and provide a supportive environment in which they can explore their thoughts and goals.
  2. Build a network of your own: Building a network of friends and colleagues inside and outside of medicine can help you stay connected and informed during medical school. Seek out opportunities to connect with other partners and spouses, and consider joining clubs and organizations that align with your interests.
  3. Plan for the future: Medical school is an investment in your partner’s future, and it is important to plan for the changes and opportunities that may come with a new degree. Consider your long-term goals and aspirations, and have open and honest conversations about how the MD degree will impact your shared future.

If you can make it through medical school and residency, the rest of your life is gravy. Embrace the idea that you’re both undertaking something really hard, but intensely meaningful. I used to joke that being married to a medical resident was like having a flight attendant as a roommate: they’re not around much, but when they come back they have interesting stories.

In a relationship that lasts a lifetime, different partners will need support at different times, and frankly during this phase your med school partner will probably need more from you than they can give back. Share their burden and appreciate the role you can play in the life you’re building together!

For more help with your personal statement, check us out at Gurufi.com. Our personal statement editors and consultants have decades of experience helping clients get into top Masters and Ph.D. programs in STEM, humanities, fine arts, and social sciences. Our specialty is helping you craft compelling personal statements that move the needle in your admissions process! For questions, shoot us an email at service@gurufi.com. Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.