How to Get Advice for Your Personal Statement

A cartoon illustrating a 'Frankenstein Essay' scenario. A student holding a disjointed essay with visible seams and patches, resembling Frankenstein's monster. Surrounding the student are a roommate, a professor, a premed advisor, a friend, and a parent, all giving conflicting advice. The student looks confused and overwhelmed. The background includes a messy desk with books, notes, and a laptop. — Beware the dreaded “Frankenstein Essay”!

Since founding Gurufi in 2008, I have helped clients fix, tighten, and rework probably 15,000 personal statements. Because I’ve had so many reps, I can instantly spot what I’ve come to call “the Frankenstein Essay.”

These essays are distinctive for their abrupt change of voice, inexplicable jumps between narratives, and the overall sense that I’m not reading a single coherent essay, but rather a weird amalgam pieced together from the parts of five or six different sources. Whenever I get one of these, I’ll ask a client, “so, how many people did you show the first draft of your personal statement to?” Without fail, they’ll tell me that they showed everybody they could think of who might help: their roommate, a professor, the school’s premed / pre-law advisor, etc.

This is a huge mistake.

Look, it’s understandable that once you’ve finished your personal statement, you may feel a little apprehensive about what you have written, and as such it is only reasonable to seek out second and third opinions in order to make sure that you have overlooked nothing, the prose is tight, and you have made a compelling case for your candidacy. But, just as an excellent revision and editing can make an average essay excellent, bad editing can wreck an essay. On such occasions, one is smart to heed the old aphorism that ‘too many cooks spoil the broth.’

Once you have completed your first draft, you need to think carefully about how you go about using advice from other people. Here are six pointers for how to get the best advice in order to turn your draft into an excellent final version you are proud of and happy with.

1.) Be careful about who you pick.

Obviously, you want to get advice from someone who writes well, can be frank with you, and has some understanding of the field to which you are applying. If you choose to get advice from a boyfriend or your mother, for example, then be careful because they might give you an overly glowing review because of their esteem and love for you or may lack the qualifications to point out minor problems with your approach. Similarly, asking your English major friend to look at your Engineering graduate school essay is not a bad idea, but if you go that route, having someone involved in engineering (preferably in an academic capacity) also look at your essay is a good idea.

Good people to talk to are your academic advisor (if you are applying to graduate or professional schools) or guidance counselor (if you are applying to college). I know that many people will take their essays to message boards and post them to see what people think of it. This is the one thing I would advise you NEVER to do. The problem here is that you have no real way to gauge someone’s level of expertise and you may get too much feedback from too many sources.

Which leads us to point #2…

Don’t give it to too many people.

If you get critiques on your essay from 8-9 different people and you incorporate all of their suggestions, you will be pulled in too many directions and the essay will lose its sense of voice and focus. The old joke that a camel is a horse designed by committee applies here. Your essay cannot be everything to everyone, and you must accept this fact. There will always be something that someone would have done differently, so they will often naturally advise you that you should do something different than what you are doing.

Ask follow-up questions

Whenever someone suggests a change, don’t be afraid to ask them about it. Sometimes you will agree with their rationale but disagree with the execution of the change. Also, through a conversation people will often help you see larger problems that you may have missed. People are often hesitant to give tough advice, and a friendly conversation can help you avoid this problem because by talking to someone, the person will see that you are serious about valuing their advice.

The most frequent form of advice that people will give is, “you should include _____.” Now, this is often useful advice, but because most personal statements have tight word caps, you can’t just add everything that might kinda-sorta be relevant. Thus, in my experience, one of the best questions you can ask is, “if you think that I should add ____, what do you think I should take out to make room for this new text?”

The reason is that writing is about choices, and just because something is relevant in the abstract doesn’t mean that it should be included in your essay. If their suggestion for what you should remove to make room for their suggested new text is something that you don’t think you can lose, then that may indicate that you should ignore this bit of advice.

Which brings us to Point #4:

Don’t be afraid to ignore advice.

At the end of the day, this is *your* personal statement, and *your* future depends on how well you execute it. When someone suggests changes, consider their level of expertise (both as a writer and as a subject-matter expert), think about it carefully and, if you disagree, then don’t do it. Not every piece of advice given is good; often, you will receive terrible advice.

The final decision is yours, so take your role as the gatekeeper of advice seriously, and only let the best suggestions that work well with your theme, tone, approach and goal through.

BUT, try to avoid pride of authorship

In my capacity as an admissions essay consultant, I often encounter customers who are furious when I tell them that they have things that they need to work on. It is almost as if they paid me $500 for me to tell them that their work was perfect, and they should not change a single letter.

Because a personal statement is so, well, personal, it can sometimes sting when someone gives you pointed advice. Try to see the bigger picture and embrace the process that will help you to move towards a better and stronger essay. Do your best not to see a critique of your essay as a criticism of you as a person, and rather see it as a positive moment that moves you one step closer to your goal.

Consider using an essay editing service

They can be a bit expensive, but in the end, if you’re willing to tens -or even hundreds- of thousands of dollars on college or graduate school, spending a small fraction of that to get you into your desired school only makes sense. Getting into a top school, as opposed to an average one, is worth investing in.

Some things to consider:

-Make sure that they guarantee your satisfaction.

-Ask if they will work with you beyond just receiving a single revision back from you. Often, it will take 2-3 exchanges with your editor to completely understand what you want to say, how you want to say it, and what core message you want to convey.

In the end, selecting the right editor / consultant is a personal choice about vibe and fit. We at Gurufi.com understand that admissions can be a stressful and opaque process, and our editors are fantastic at working with you to produce a powerful essay that reflects your personality and aspirations.

For more help with your personal statement, check us out at Gurufi.com. Our personal statement editors and consultants have decades of experience helping clients get into top Masters and Ph.D. programs in STEM, humanities, fine arts, and social sciences. Our specialty is helping you craft compelling personal statements that move the needle in your admissions process! For questions, shoot us an email at service@gurufi.com. Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.

Ten Tips for Writing a Powerful Diversity Essay

10 Questions About Diversity Essays

A diverse group of students engaging in a lively discussion in a college setting, representing various ethnicities, genders, and backgrounds, highlighting their unique identities and perspectives. — Schools care a lot about diversity, so give real care to your Diversity Statement!

Perhaps no part of college or graduate school applications confuses people more than the diversity statement. Since we began helping applicants in 2008, Gurufi has helped hundreds of candidates craft compelling diversity statements, but so many times our consultations begin with them asking, “what am I even supposed to write here!?!?” This is especially true of international applicants applying to American schools, where discussions of diversity are more important.

In short, diversity statements offer a platform for applicants to highlight their unique backgrounds, experiences, and perspectives, demonstrating how they can contribute to a diverse and inclusive academic environment. Schools have repeatedly professed a desire in the educational benefits of diverse classes, so they use these statements to help build incoming cohorts that reflect a range of experiences, backgrounds, ethnicities, genders, and beliefs. Given this, how should you approach writing a powerful, honest, and effective diversity statement? In this blog post, we address ten common questions about diversity essays, providing insights and tips to help you craft a compelling and effective essay.

1. What is the purpose of a diversity essay?

The purpose of a diversity essay is to provide admissions committees with a deeper understanding of your unique background and experiences, and how these have shaped your perspectives and contributions. It allows you to showcase your ability to contribute to the diversity of the academic community and how your unique experiences have prepared you to succeed in a diverse environment. This essay helps the committee understand the value you bring to the institution beyond your academic achievements.

These essays emerged out of a changing American legal landscape where affirmative action (the country’s decades-old system of bringing greater racial and ethnic diversity to various educational and professional positions) was challenged and limited in certain ways. In short, schools can no longer ask applicants for their race for purposes of admission, BUT they may take a broader view of background as expressed through personal statements and diversity statements. Thus, to put a crass outcome-focused spin on it: if you’re from a background that’s traditionally underrepresented, here is a good place to explain that so that you can be identified as an applicant who, while otherwise qualified and prepared, would also add to the school’s diversity.

2. How can I effectively showcase my unique background in a diversity essay?

To effectively showcase your unique background, focus on specific experiences that highlight your identity, culture, and personal journey. You can’t just say, “I’m Black” or “I’m gay.” You have do the additional work of providing a narrative or story that makes clear how this demographic reality has shaped your experience, worldview, or aspirations. Discuss challenges you have faced and overcome, and how these experiences have transformed you or altered your trajectory. Be honest and authentic in your storytelling, and provide concrete examples that illustrate your unique perspective and contributions. Reflect on how your background has influenced your academic and professional goals and how you plan to leverage these experiences in your future endeavors.

3. What are some common topics for diversity essays?

Common topics for diversity essays include:
1. **Cultural Background:** Discuss your cultural heritage, traditions, and how they have influenced your identity.
2. **Challenges and Overcoming Adversity:** Describe significant obstacles you have faced and how you overcame them.
3. **Unique Experiences:** Highlight experiences that are unique to your background, such as growing up in a diverse community or being a first-generation college student.
4. **Community Involvement:** Share your involvement in community service or advocacy efforts that reflect your commitment to diversity and inclusion.
5. **Personal Growth:** Reflect on moments of personal growth that have shaped your values and perspective on diversity.

If you’re not from an underrepresented background and write an essay like this, then you have one of two choices. First, you can take a more expansive view of diversity that might include diversity of opinion, professional experience, or other aspects of your background. Second, (and far more complicated!!) you could acknowledge that you don’t come from such a background, but talk in substantive ways about how you have and will contribute to supporting diverse populations.

4. How can I connect my personal experiences to my academic goals in a diversity essay?

Connecting your personal experiences to your academic goals involves reflecting on how your background has influenced your academic interests and career aspirations. Discuss specific experiences that sparked your passion for your chosen field and how they have prepared you for academic success. Explain how your unique perspective will contribute to the academic community and how the program you are applying to will help you achieve your goals. Highlight any relevant skills, insights, or perspectives gained from your experiences that are applicable to your academic and professional aspirations.

I often ask clients to “tell me your origin story,” as though they’re a superhero who has to explain why they’ve elected to pursue this path. Thinking of background this way can provide ideas for a unique diversity statement.

5. What mistakes should I avoid in a diversity essay?

Common mistakes to avoid in a diversity essay include:
1. **Being Vague:** Avoid broad generalizations and provide specific examples and detailed descriptions. The best way to avoid this pitfall is through thoughtfully selected stories.
2. **Overemphasis on Hardships:** While discussing challenges is important, balance this with reflections on growth, resilience, and positive outcomes. Whatever challenge you’ve faced, the most important part of that story is your response to it.
3. **Ignoring the Prompt:** Ensure your essay addresses the specific question or prompt provided by the application.
4. **Neglecting to Proofread:** Spelling and grammatical errors can detract from your professionalism. Proofread your essay multiple times and consider having others review it.
5. **Lack of Authenticity:** Be genuine and honest in your writing, avoiding exaggerated or fabricated experiences. This is a real problem because often people don’t know what to write so they simply regurgitate what they expect their audience wants to hear.

6. How can I make my diversity essay stand out?

To make your diversity essay stand out, focus on authenticity, clarity, and compelling storytelling. Here are some tips:
1. **Be Yourself:** Let your unique voice and personality shine through your writing.
2. **Tell a Story:** Use a narrative structure to make your essay more engaging. Share specific anecdotes that highlight your key qualities and experiences.
3. **Show, Don’t Just Tell:** Use concrete examples to illustrate your points rather than making broad statements.
4. **Connect the Dots:** Clearly link your past experiences, present motivations, and future goals.
5. **Tailor to Each School:** Customize your essay for each program, highlighting why you are a great fit for their specific offerings.

7. How should I structure my diversity essay?

As with any essay, there is no set way that you MUST structure it. Rather, there are easier and harder ways, and ways that are better or worse suited for the kinds of things you want to emphasize. If that was a frustratingly vague answer, here is a sample(and only one; yours doesn’t have to be this way!) format you can use for your essay:

**Introduction:** Start with a compelling story that captures the reader’s attention and introduces the main theme of your essay. Don’t try to write a hook. Those come across as gimmicky and forced.
2. **Body:** Divide the body into several paragraphs, each focusing on a specific aspect of your background, experiences, and goals. Use this section to provide detailed examples and reflections.
3. **Conclusion:** Summarize the key points of your essay and reiterate how your unique experiences will contribute to the academic community. End with a strong closing statement that leaves a lasting impression. A good tip is to return to your introduction and look at the ideas, words, phrases, and images you used. Select some to sprinkle throughout your conclusion. This will give the essay a sense of completeness, of coming full circle… as opposed to just stopping.

8. How can I highlight my contributions to diversity in a diversity essay?

Highlighting your contributions to diversity involves discussing specific actions you have taken to promote diversity and inclusion. Share examples of your involvement in diversity-related initiatives, advocacy efforts, or community service projects. Explain the impact of these activities and how they reflect your commitment to fostering an inclusive environment. Reflect on what you have learned from these experiences and how they have prepared you to contribute to the diversity of the academic community you are applying to.

9. What role does storytelling play in a diversity essay?

Storytelling plays a crucial role in a diversity essay as it makes your experiences and insights more relatable and engaging. Using a narrative approach allows you to illustrate your points with vivid, concrete examples that capture the reader’s interest. Stories help to humanize your essay, making it easier for the admissions committee to connect with you on a personal level. Effective storytelling involves setting the scene, describing the challenge or experience, and reflecting on the outcome and lessons learned.

10. How do I conclude a diversity essay effectively?

Concluding a diversity essay effectively involves reinforcing the key themes of your essay and leaving a lasting impression. Here’s how to craft a strong conclusion:
1. **Summarize Key Points:** Briefly recap the main themes of your essay without repeating them verbatim.
2. **Restate Your Contributions:** Reiterate how your unique background and experiences will contribute to the academic community.
3. **End on a Strong Note:** Use a powerful closing statement or call to action that underscores your enthusiasm and readiness to contribute to a diverse and inclusive environment.

Writing a compelling diversity essay requires thoughtful reflection and a clear presentation of your unique experiences and contributions. By addressing these common questions and incorporating the advice provided, you can craft an essay that authentically represents your background and demonstrates your commitment to diversity and inclusion. Remember to be genuine, specific, and reflective in your writing, and you will create a compelling narrative that resonates with admissions committees.

Ten Tips for Your Grad School Writing Sample

Colorful cartoon of students working on their graduate school writing samples in a cozy study space with the help of an experienced editor from Gurufi. The students are smiling and focused, surrounded by books, laptops, and coffee cups, while the friendly editor offers guidance. Text overlay: 'Refine Your Writing Sample with Gurufi – Your Path to Graduate School Success! — Your writing sample is a central part of your application… so you better get it right!

Many graduate programs, particularly in the humanities and social sciences, request that applicants submit a writing sample. At Gurufi, our experienced editor have helped scores of successful applicants refine their writing samples and earn admission to top schools. Here we go over ten common questions that people have about writing samples and provide ideas for how you can make this a strength of your application.

Overview:

Graduate school writing samples are an integral part of many applications, providing a window into your academic abilities, research skills, and potential for success in a rigorous academic environment. In this blog post, we address ten common questions about graduate school writing samples, offering guidance on how to select, craft, and present a strong sample that enhances your application.

1. What is the purpose of a graduate school writing sample?

The purpose of a graduate school writing sample is to demonstrate your writing ability, analytical skills, and readiness for graduate-level work. It allows the admissions committee to assess your capacity to engage with complex ideas, conduct thorough research, and communicate your findings effectively. The writing sample provides a concrete example of your academic capabilities and helps the committee determine if you are well-suited for the demands of their program and have sophisticated insights into the kind of complex issues that people engage with, especially within Ph.D. programs.

2. How do I choose the best writing sample for my graduate school application?

In short, you need to pick a writing sample that is germane, excellent, polished, and ideally is also representative of the kind of work you aspire to do. Showcase your strengths. To this end, consider the following tips:
1. **Relevance:** Choose a sample that is relevant to the field of study you are applying for. This demonstrates your knowledge and interest in the subject area. Even if you wrote an awesome paper for your American History class, that might not be the best choice for a Sociology graduate program.
2. **Quality:** Select a well-written piece that reflects your best work. Ensure it is free of errors and well-organized. Importantly, even if you got strong marks on the essay, you should spend a week or two refining it and revising it. Perhaps even think about tweaking it to align perfectly with the school you’re submitting it to and the strengths of that program.
3. **Length:** Follow the program’s guidelines regarding the length of the writing sample. If no guidelines are provided, a typical length is 10-20 pages.
4. **Originality:** Choose a piece that highlights your original thinking and research skills. This could be a research paper, a thesis chapter, or a critical essay.

3. What should I include in the introduction of my writing sample?

First, remember that if you are choosing a topic that’s germane to the field you’re applying to, you can expect for your reader to be quite familiar with the core ideas. That said, it would be helpful to include the prompt / assignment description if there is one. Otherwise, the writing should speak for itself as a coherent and internally consistent document, so the things that make a strong introduction in any essay apply to this one.

The introduction of your writing sample should provide a clear and concise overview of the topic, the research question or thesis, and the significance of your work. It should set the context for your research and outline the structure of the paper. The introduction should engage the reader and provide a roadmap for what to expect in the rest of the document.

4. How can I demonstrate my research skills in my writing sample?

To demonstrate your research skills, ensure your writing sample includes a well-defined research question or thesis, a comprehensive literature review, and (if relevant) a robust methodology section. Use credible sources and provide proper citations to support your arguments. Present your findings clearly and analyze the data effectively. Highlight your ability to synthesize information and draw insightful conclusions from your research.

It’s a good idea to talk to the professor for whom you originally wrote the paper and ask them for additional input on how they can strengthen the text for this particular purpose and school. Think about additional research you can do, if necessary, to demonstrate knowledge of the field.

5. What are common mistakes to avoid in a graduate school writing sample?

Common mistakes to avoid in a graduate school writing sample include:
1. **Poor Organization:** Ensure your paper is well-structured with clear headings and logical flow.
2. **Weak Thesis:** Present a strong and focused thesis or research question.
3. **Insufficient Analysis:** Provide thorough analysis and avoid simply summarizing sources.
4. **Lack of Clarity:** Write clearly and concisely, avoiding jargon and overly complex sentences.
5. **Grammatical Errors:** Proofread your sample multiple times to eliminate any spelling or grammatical errors. This really should not happen. For a paper of this importance, you should go over it a dozen or more times, looking for any errors.

6. How long should my graduate school writing sample be?

Most applications will specify a length. The length of your graduate school writing sample should follow the guidelines provided by the program you are applying to. If no specific length is mentioned, a typical writing sample ranges from 10 to 20 pages. Ensure that the sample is long enough to demonstrate your ability to conduct in-depth research and analysis, but not so long that it overwhelms the reader. Quality is more important than quantity, so focus on presenting a well-written and cohesive piece.

If your best writing came in a 60-page thesis, for instance, then think about whether your best approach is to reduce that down to 20 pages or whether you should select an excellent 20-page representative section. Ideally that section would be relatively self-sustaining, perhaps with a page or so of explanation that it was taken from a larger text for which you provide sufficient context and explanation.

7. How can I make my writing sample stand out?

To make your writing sample stand out, focus on the following aspects:
1. **Originality:** Present original ideas and perspectives that demonstrate your intellectual curiosity and critical thinking skills.
2. **Clarity:** Write clearly and concisely, ensuring your arguments are easy to follow.
3. **Relevance:** Choose a topic that is relevant to your field of study and showcases your expertise.
4. **Analysis:** Provide thorough and insightful analysis that goes beyond surface-level observations.
5. **Professionalism:** Ensure your sample is polished, well-formatted, and free of errors.

8. What role does the writing sample play in the admissions process?

The writing sample plays a crucial role in the admissions process as it provides tangible evidence of your academic abilities and potential for success in graduate school. It allows the admissions committee to evaluate your writing skills, research capabilities, and ability to engage with complex topics. A strong writing sample can significantly enhance your application by demonstrating your readiness for graduate-level work and your fit for the program.

In many programs, the writing sample determines which professor reviews your application, so be sure to account for that in terms of how you frame your admissions strategy.

9. How should I format my graduate school writing sample?

Personally, I don’t think this one matters much. As long as your formatting is clean and consistent, you should be fine. That said, some people believe that you should format your graduate school writing sample following academic standards and any specific guidelines provided by the program. Here are some general tips:
1. **Font and Spacing:** Use a standard font such as Times New Roman, 12-point size, and double-spacing.
2. **Margins:** Use 1-inch margins on all sides.
3. **Headings:** Use clear headings and subheadings to organize your paper.
4. **Citations:** Follow a consistent citation style (e.g., APA, MLA, Chicago) and include a bibliography or reference list.
5. **Title Page:** Include a title page with your name, the title of the paper, and any other required information.

10. How do I address feedback and revisions in my writing sample?

Addressing feedback and revisions is an important part of preparing a strong writing sample. Here’s how to approach it:
1. **Seek Feedback Early:** Share your draft with professors, mentors, or peers to get constructive feedback.
2. **Be Open to Criticism:** Accept feedback with an open mind and consider how it can improve your work.
3. **Revise Thoroughly:** Make necessary revisions to strengthen your arguments, clarify your writing, and correct any errors.
4. **Proofread Again:** After revising, proofread your sample multiple times to ensure it is polished and error-free.

Conclusion

A well-crafted graduate school writing sample is a key component of your application, showcasing your academic abilities and research skills. By addressing these common questions and incorporating the advice provided, you can select and prepare a writing sample that effectively demonstrates your potential for success in graduate school. Remember to be thoughtful, thorough, and reflective in your writing, and you will create a compelling sample that enhances your application.

For more help with your writing sample, CV, or personal statement, check us out at Gurufi.com. Our personal statement editors and consultants have decades of experience helping clients get into top Masters and Ph.D. programs in STEM, humanities, fine arts, and social sciences. Our specialty is helping you craft compelling personal statements that move the needle in your admissions process! For questions, shoot us an email at service@gurufi.com. Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.

Mastering the MBA Personal Statement: From CV to Compelling Story

Crafting an MBA personal statement can be daunting. For many applicants, it’s the most uncomfortable part of the application process, transforming a straightforward CV into a compelling narrative. Yet, mastering this challenge is crucial for standing out in a competitive field. Here’s a comprehensive guide to help you navigate from your CV to a polished personal statement.

The Right Mindset

Your personal statement is about your future. Unlike a CV, which lists past achievements, your essay should articulate a clear, specific, and feasible plan for your future. This plan should align with the strengths and resources of the schools you are applying to, guiding your selection of stories and experiences to highlight.

Begin by asking yourself: “What do I want to become and do?” Then, follow up with: “What specifically do I need to learn to make that happen?” and “What is the foundation that has prepared me to pursue this knowledge?” Your past achievements matter, but only in the context of how they have prepared you for your future goals.

The One Big Question: Storytelling

The heart of your personal statement lies in storytelling. Rather than providing a breadth of experiences, focus on a few well-chosen stories that convey your traits and readiness for your goals. Ask yourself:

What traits am I trying to convey?
How can I demonstrate that I’m ready to pursue my given goal?
What stories convey those traits and demonstrate your preparedness?

Remember, showing is more effective than telling. Instead of stating, “I have great entrepreneurial instincts,” show it through a story, like, “When Jane and I built Xenotech, we identified an unserved niche in the market and created a plan to service it.” A compelling story should make clear the trait you’re trying to convey without explicitly stating it.

Building and Writing Great Stories

Every personal statement must answer the clear “why?” questions:

Why MBA?
Why now?
What is your vision for the future?
What experiences or potential do you have that supports this vision?

Incorporate “the steak and the sizzle” into your stories. The “steak” includes a clear rationale for why you need an MBA, why now is the right time, and evidence of your ability or potential, grounded in past experiences. This foundation ensures you are not bragging but demonstrating your qualifications.

The “sizzle” adds passion, excitement, and personality to your stories. Showcase human moments and personal interactions that reveal your leadership, learning, and moments of loss. Avoid being all steak or all sizzle. All steak with no sizzle is boring and misses the chance to let your personality shine. Conversely, all sizzle with no steak comes off as emotional but lacking substance.

Your Plan of Attack

Get a Notebook: Write down your aspirations and the traits or skills you hope to acquire or build upon.
Identify Stories: List instances where you demonstrated or failed to demonstrate these traits. Failure can be a powerful source for a compelling essay.
Connect the Dots: For each trait, find a story that shows your excellence and readiness to achieve your goals.

Final Hints

Before you start outlining, have a clear sense of what you hope to emphasize. Distill your core positioning down to 2-3 sentences. Use brainstorming and freewriting to generate useful content. Remember, your core task is storytelling.

Conclusion

Mastering the MBA personal statement requires a balance of clear planning and engaging storytelling. By focusing on your future goals, selecting meaningful stories, and blending rational arguments with personal passion, you can create a compelling narrative that stands out. For more tips and personalized guidance, check out Gurufi.com, where we’ve helped over 10,000 applicants achieve their dream schools. Good luck!

Ten Mistakes to Avoid in Your Medical School Personal Essay

A cartoon of a stressed-out student sitting at a cluttered desk with a laptop, books, papers, and a coffee cup, showing a worried expression with a thought bubble containing 5300 characters, a doctor, a hospital, and a ticking clock. — 5300 Characters Can Determine Your Life!

5300 characters. That’s all you have. After years spent taking demanding prerequisites, stuffing your CV full of volunteer, research, and clinical experiences, and studying for months for the MCAT, you have 5300 characters -about 700 words- to tell the admissions committee why they should take you. No pressure.

In our 18 years of helping clients build compelling personal statements for medical school, we have seen people make just about every mistake you can imagine. Sometimes people make amazing new ones, but mostly they tend to make the same ones that most of their fellow applicants make. Avoiding these mistakes can help you create a stronger, more effective personal statement. Here are some typical errors and advice on how to avoid them:

1. Being Too Generic

One of the most common mistakes is writing a generic personal statement that could apply to any applicant. Admissions committees read thousands of essays, so it’s essential to make yours stand out. Avoid clichés and broad statements like “I want to help people” or “I have always been passionate about medicine.”

Don’t open with a bedside story about the night your grandma died and please avoid, at all costs, the phrase “tears in her eyes…” Yes, you do need to provide specific examples and personal anecdotes that highlight your unique journey and motivations, but do it in a way that features how you really felt and acted, and not how you think the AdCom wants to see you or how you imagine the scene might play out in a Hallmark Channel Christmas movie.

Focusing Too Much on Others
While it’s important to acknowledge the influence of mentors, family members, or patients, your personal statement should primarily focus on you. Thus the “personal” in “personal statement.” Avoid spending too much time discussing other people’s achievements or stories. Admissions committees want to learn about your experiences, qualities, and aspirations. Make sure your essay centers on your journey and how it has prepared you for a career in medicine.

It’s fine if you weren’t the MVP of the team or the leader of the group. Focus on what you DID do, the role you played, and what it taught you.

Listing Experiences Without Reflection

A great personal statement is far more than just a narrative CV. Simply listing your experiences and accomplishments is not enough. Admissions committees are looking for reflection and insight. Explain the significance of each experience and how it has shaped your decision to pursue medicine. Discuss the skills and lessons you have gained and how they have prepared you for medical school and a medical career.

A good rule of thumb is to “tell fewer stories better.” Instead of stuffing six stories into your essay, instead focus on two or three. Remember, you have your Work & Activities section and secondary essays to cover additional ground.

Overemphasizing Academic Achievements

While academic achievements are important, your personal statement should provide a holistic view of who you are. Avoid focusing solely on your academic successes. Highlight your extracurricular activities, volunteer work, research, clinical experiences, and personal interests. This approach demonstrates that you are a well-rounded individual with diverse experiences and skills.

Typically, you don’t even mention your grades or academic awards in a personal statement. The committee will already have that data, so no need to rehash it.

5. Neglecting to Address Motivations

Your essay needs, at some point, to answer the “why medicine?” question. Admissions committees want to understand why you are passionate about medicine and what drives you to pursue this challenging career. Failing to clearly articulate your motivations is a common mistake. Reflect on the experiences and values that have led you to this path and explain them compellingly. This clarity helps the committee see your genuine commitment to the field.

Importantly, if you have extensive experience within a field such as nursing or public health and you are looking to transition into a medical career, you need to make sure that your “why medicine?” also covers the “why not just keep working within public health?”

Writing a Chronological Essay

Your personal statement doesn’t HAVE TO be chronological. Avoid simply recounting your life story in order. Instead, focus on a few key experiences that have been pivotal in your decision to pursue medicine. Use these experiences to illustrate your qualities, motivations, and readiness for medical school. A thematic approach can make your essay more engaging and impactful. And, if done well, opening a bit further forward, then in your second paragraph doing a “soft reset” and telling your full story can be really effective.

7. Using Complex Language and Jargon

While it’s important to write professionally, using overly complex language or medical jargon can make your essay difficult to read. It also feels stiff and inhuman at a moment when you are trying to establish a sense of connection with your reader. Aim for clarity and simplicity. Write in a way that is accessible to a broad audience, including those who may not have a medical background. Clear and concise writing is more effective and demonstrates strong communication skills.

8. Failing to Show Personal Growth

Medical schools are looking for applicants who demonstrate personal growth and the ability to learn from experiences. Failing to show this growth is a missed opportunity. Reflect on the challenges you have faced and how you have overcome them. Discuss what you have learned from your experiences and how they have prepared you for a career in medicine. This reflection shows maturity and resilience.

9. Not Proofreading Carefully

Typos, grammatical errors, and awkward phrasing can detract from the quality of your personal statement. Not proofreading carefully is a common mistake that can be easily avoided. After writing your essay, take the time to proofread it multiple times.

Not getting outside help.

Consider seeking feedback from mentors, peers, or professional consultants to catch any errors you might have missed. A polished, error-free essay reflects your attention to detail and professionalism. Obviously, this is something we can help you with at Gurufi.com, but if you cannot afford outside services, then lean on people whose writing you trust and also see what resources your school provides, as many will help former graduates even some years after they leave.

For more help with your personal statement, check us out at Gurufi.com. Our personal statement editors and consultants have decades of experience helping clients get into top medical schools. Our specialty is helping you craft compelling personal statements that move the needle in your admissions process! For questions, shoot us an email at service@gurufi.com. Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.